TNN 93
Hello folks… an’ welcome again to we broadcast… (deep voice)…This Is TNN…… For there simply is no room in this whole wide world,…. for an uneducated little boy or girl…don’t allow idle companions to lead astray…..to earn tomorrow, yuh gotta learn today…… (background music, Sparrow)
Jumpstation: Start de fete; Flyin' off de handle; A noble achievement; How to know when you is no longer a Trini/'Bagonian.
Noooo, not Carnival, election campaign…. DJ’s go make real money dis rounds because over de las’ two days, dey register 3 parties. It have to be fete dem talkin’ about, because dey cyah be serious!
Lok nah, You Ent See (UNC) what happen wit’ de rulin’ party?! Man, Ram an’ de boys register ah party “jus’ in case” dey end up in court, an’ Bas an’ he gang register anodder one “jus’ in case”, an’ it still have de main UNC party. Yuh confuse?
Okay , lemme explain .. de party name and logo belong to de UNC party.. now if de party split, no one side can claim de use of de party name, because dey could get sue, so each side register ah new party name. Now de Executive of de party, controlled by Ram (we former AG) should really have rights to it, but we go see…… yuh might end up with one party havin’ TWO candidates in each constituency , depending on whether yuh is ah “Panday loyalist” or yuh “want to give back de party to de people”. Now dey gone an’ have Parliamentary Caucus meetin’ and vote to throw out de three fellas who makin’ ruchshun, but de executive (which dem fellas have control of) have to approve it! So himself have to fire himself! Ah never see ah pack ah cards wit’ so many jokers in it!
Now remember de 3 trouble makers had teamed up with Manos in Parliament to defeat de passage of legislation an’ help precipitate an election; dey had formed an accommodation, now election comin’ Manos backin’ away an’ sayin’ he fightin’ de elections as PNM and PNM alone, so people face twist up like rope wondering what de story is.
In de meantime, dem graphic designers makin’ ah mint, because is party symbols like mad comin’ on stream…. Rumour is dat even de ole NAR might be comin’ wit’ ah name change, because dey havin’ talks with Wendo Mottley to join dey party, is all kind of malcady dat takin’ place right now.
Of course, as time goes on, expect some odder oddities to crop up.. remember one year we had de Natural Law party, who wanted to chant down de place until world peace come, an’ anodder one last year who had ah marijuana plant as he symbol an’ all dat?
Yes, man, who knows.. de Cobra might decide to jump in de brew… ah have alyuh vote or what?!
Which is what most people did dis week when dey hear dat dey had to pay 100 dollars extra to travel…
De transport Minister say is ah security tax due to Sept. 11th an’ de amount of security dey have to have now… den she slip in ah sentence dat talk about de need to maintain de new airport, but she insist is not ah tax.
Now, call me cynical, but ent we payin’ ah $100 departure tax already which suppose to go to de Airports Authority to maintain de airport? An’ we already payin’ ah security tax, if ah not mistaken, so how de hell dis odder $100 dollars come about?
An’ lemme show alyuh somet’ing… simple mathematics.. assume 2000 people travelling overseas per day… dat is $200, 000 PER DAY for security! Wha’ happen, is B 52 bombers we buyin’?! Now dat translates to $6 M a month and to $72 M a year for security and maintenance… Ah t’ink de Transport Minister livin’ to close too ah “herb” garden!
So we go collect (rermember we have airport tax of $100 dollars already) some $144 M at least from de travelling public each year. After de airport cost $800 M MORE dan it suppose to, an’ it still eh up to international standards yet! Ah mean, have ah wretched heart nah man….. at least gi’ meh ah properly working airport BEFORE yuh start to charge meh… dat is like askin’ for ah tip before yuh serve de meal!
Now ah see she backin’ off, sayin’ dat dey have to re-examine de whole issue again, so dey go stop de tax…for now… an’ ah quite agree.. Ah doh min’ ah $10 extra or somet’ing so. De only problem is, ah doh t’ink is de tax dat need re-examining, the examination should be for somebody head!
A NOBLE (NOBEL?) ACHIEVEMENT....
The papers was agog dis week wit’ de news that Sir Vidya Naipaul won de Nobel prize for Literature. Of course in TnT, nothin’ is straight forward, some kinda baccahnal mus’ take place.
So it have people who jump up an’ say dat de man never like Trinidad, hold we in contempt an’ in fact didn’t even mention we when he said it was a great honour for “ … England, my home, and the India the home of my ancestors” or something to dat effect. Not ah mention of Trini, unlike Derek Walcott who was oozing Trinidad in he acceptance speech. So why budder wit’ him…?
Odders say no matter what he say, he still Trini an’ if he eh like de place , de man free to have he own opinion . How yuh could vex wit’ him for dat? An’ ah lot of de work he write on was derived from a Trinidadian experience.
Now in my opinion, we already give de man de Trinity Cross, so to ignore him now go be stupid. My t’ing is congratulate him, give him ah lil token, invite him to come yearly to do workshops / seminars in literature or writing, something like dat…… or give ah literature prize in he name. No need to hug him up, kiss him up an’ all dat.. de man is NOT comfortable wit’ Trinidad (influenced largely by post war rural Trinidad where he grew up) an’ has no intention of coming here to live.
Whether he (or WE!) like it or not he is Trinidadian, he grew from birth to manhood here and this influence (unfortunately towards the negative side) is what made him. He could not write in isolation, we gave him the canvas on which he made his art. So, as I see it, we jus’ need to do what he have to do… plain an’ simple, me eh say to hol’ de MAN up as a patriot or anyt’ing so, but hold his WORK up for odders to see… Yuh unnerstan’…?
Hey, alyuh t’ink ah could sen’ meh writings for dem to judge.. ah might win ah something, eh?
Yuh know how when some people go away dey does forget wey dey come from. Well de Cobra, after much research in Trini characteristics has just released de definitive list of:
"HOW TO
KNOW WHEN YUH IS NO LONGER AH TRINI/'BAGONIAN"....
or alternatively “Yuh know is time to burn yuh
TnT passport
when….”
Yuh start “hengin’ out” instead of limin’….
Yuh feelin’ embarrass to storm ah party….
Yuh eating roti with knife and fork…..
Yuh start making road signals when yuh driving …….
Yuh cyah take even “slight” pepper in yuh doubles …….
Yuh stop tinkling de ice in yuh drink before yuh drink it ………
Yuh have problems makin’ ah steups wit’ yuh mout’……….
Yuh stop eatin’ sugar cake, toolum and paw paw balls because dey have too much calories.....
Yuh cyah turn yuh back an’ still mako ah conversation across de room …….
Yuh not usin’ expressions like “Ay boy”, “Yeah”, “Orright”, “Eh-eh” with every other sentence
Yuh drinkin’ coconut water from ah straw (Oh Lord! No!)…………….
Yuh fraid to laugh out loud because people might “look at yuh funny…”
Dat’s all for dis week folks…remember any queries, questions, comments, hail outs etc… jus’ write to we anchorman Cobra at ttcobra1@hotmail.com an’ we go get back to yuh… Take care care, alyuh, ah gone…. Peace….. If Ole lady walk ah mile an’ ahalf an’ she te-le-le…….. Ole lady walk ah mile an’ ah half an’ she te-le-le…….(background music, Kitchener)
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