TNN 87
Hello folks…an’ welcome again to we broadcast… I was under de weather for de las’ week an’ ah also had some deadlines to hit, so dat is de reason ah was Missin’ in Action.. anyway…. (deep voice)… This Is TNN…… De Caribbean man,….. from de same place… de Caribbean man…. …. (background music, Stalin)
Jumpstation: Kicksin' around'; In poor health; Get help, not aids; Back in time; Sign off.
Well, have you heard our football team’s progress (or regress) to the World Cup Finals…. well, from whey I stan’, we goin’ to de Finals in Korea/Japan… is jus’ dat we go have to pay we way! But ay-ay… nothing doin’ boy, nothin’!
Las’ week in de stadium we play Honduras, an’ is because de team fufill de dreams (of Honduras!)……. blows like rain, licks like fus’ time….. goals aplenty, we take it 4-2 (up to near de end was in fact 4-1.. we get ah consolation near de end). An’ what’ crowd support, we get less dan 5000 spectators in ah 20000 plus stadium….
Same t’ing ah tellin’ dem from earlies….
people disillusioned, not wit’ football, but wit’ what goin’ on in
football an’ de whole politising of de game… Den dey put de
tickets at $150 and $300.
No matter how dey tell “Jacko” Warner it better to get 15000 at $60
and $100 (and make a few hundred thousan’ more to booth), he insist dat Trinis
unpatriotic an’ need to be taught ah lesson… yep, he taught us alright!
Yuh could imagine how we team feel when dey walk in de stadium an’ yuh
have to look for peope between de empty seats?! Only ah Jack would do something
so!
Den before de match, dey drop two ah we foreign based players for disciplinary reasons (dey skip ah practicce match), den dey bring dem back in two days before de match….. same indecision again… de whole technical staff decide to ban dem, Jacko fly in de country an’ nex’ t’ing yuh know dey back on.. So who really in charge? De coach and technical team or de “Special Advsior” Jacko?
Big difference dat made on de field anyway… If ah might stop ah while here.. yuh see de first problem.. no rules.. now if yuh miss ah practice without good reason, den de rules should say public apology, fine, suspension etc…. but we have no such, so today yuh ban somebody, nex’ day yuh fine somebody, nex’ day yuh reprimand ah nex’ one.. an’ for de same offence (note de similarity to de West Indies Cricket Team, an’ de consequent result!)..
We have to be consistent… yuh cyah be actin’
arbitrarily… which is why some people sayin’ dey should, odders say de
shouldn’t, den dey ask de players what dey t’ink.. ole mas, ole mas… alyuh,
is not small goal football we playin’ in savannah, behind Pancho
shop! So dey never practice as ah team an’ dey walk out onto de
field… what yuh expeck?! An’
yuh still want to know why people eh payin’ de money?
An’ de las’ point.. why in every game, dis team getting’ tired.. how can you have a team dat is not fit?! Dat is de basic, number one element….! If yuh not fit, yuh cyah play football… simple, no maths! Who is responsible for team fitness? Dat is like sending’ ah no han’ man to play tennis! It will not happen fellas… t’ink, t’ink, t’ink… an’ on de question of t’inkin’, football involves de brain also, is not about kicking ball alone… we change we formation ‘bout 3 times in de las’ game, none of which worked!
After every game, we calculating mathematically how we could qualifty… well right now we dong in de “miracle” section of mathmetics.. we have to depend on odder teams to lose an’ win de nex’ FIVE games to even HOPE to qualify! (So far we loss 4, draw 1).
Dat is wey we reach, an’ dey still callin’ people unpatriotic for not comin’ out…if we was seeein’ ah genuine effort by de officials an’ players, yes, but so far, sorry, man lookin’ at dey money wit’ ah eagle eye! Leh meh hear somebody in de TTFA gi’ me de real score on de football team!
Sickening, ain’t it?! Dey jus’ fire de whole board of de North West Regional health Authority (NWRHA), because it have ah corruption investigation goin’ on.. apparently some people give contract to dey fren for equipment dat de hospital doh need an’ cyah use….
One ah dem buy ah AUDI for he use as board member without approval (damn nonsense… somebody had to approve de release of funds!). Den over ah million dollars went into private bank accounts of board people, checks of over $400-600 thousand, ah doh even want to talk about de state of de hospital…
Las’ week dey had ah mosquito invasion, before dat dey had ah rat infestation in de mortuary (t’ank goodness dey dead already!), de government refuse to pay nurses more and de new board include at least one party member who jus’ fight in de internal party elections .
Yeah dat soundin’ like ah independent board made up of competent people! Den de chairman was givin’ de Junior Health Minister talk so he get he tail fired one time!
Of course de Regional Health structure failed in England, but we decide we go make it work, rather dan usin’ de Local Government system which already in place… is better to spend dan to save money, ent?
So large scale investigation is now on… ah doh expeck too much will come of it.. man know how to cover de tracks like turtle after de lay….. De less said about de UnHEALTHy system, de better..
Ah cyah understan’ how we could spend $1.4 Billion on ah unfinished air-terminal an’ cyah have enough beds in ah hospital or basic medication or contract ah Desalination plant to make sea water into fresh water when we have enough rain to have tropical forests! (in fact, dat is probably why dey cyah buy beds!).
Dis country is in de midst of ah economic boom like never before, twin guns of oil an’ natural gas blazing an’ I seein’ parents having fete, bar-b-que and beggin’ on tv for money to send children away for ear surgery etc… WHY?
Why is there not a health fund for these special cases? A fund of $6M TT would cover dese poor citizens. We doh have ah mobile clinic system for rural areas.. yuh have to line up like Christmas in ah gift store to get ah simple operation, because all de theatres eh functioning…… an’ we payin’ ah health surcharge tax?!
Now yuh put big t’ief in ah health system…. is enough to make yuh sick… but yuh fraid to do so. Yuh might end up in arms of de (no) health care system….!
Well las’ week mark 20 years since we know of de existence of AIDS as ah disease. We start to test de AIDS vaccine on volunteers dis week in TnT. Ah really admire dem people who volunteer for tests, boy.. dat is selflessness… who say it doh have good people around no more?!
But on a nex’ note, we suppose to have more dan 30,000 (at least) in TnT an’ yet still like we jus’ whistling in de dark. De 19-25 groups in women and de 25-40 group in men apparently is de groups at risk. Yet I eh hearing about voluntary testing stations, or mandatory even for workers.
Ah mean, if somebody tell meh I have tuh get ah tes’ , what I getting’ on stupid for… if ah have it, it means ah could deal wit’ it an’ make adjustments. If ah doh have it, meh mind at rest. So I suggest some compulsory testing should be instituted by companies. We have to get ah grip on dis t’ing….. dis eh no disease to be in de dark about, yuh know. When yuh getting’ immunised against measles, small pox, etc., yuh does complain? Same t’img sah… yuh getting’ ah free medical test, take it…
So far I eh seein’ no real campaign, except by some civil groups, no articulated national plans to deal with AIDS, etc… De lates’ is dat de want to make condoms widely available, especially to young people (plaster on ah sore)…..
Yuh assumin’ dat dey go behave rationally an’ use dem an’ dat de females involved have de power in ah relationship to make dey men folk use it…. ah have ah nasty surprise for alyuh…. it doh work so! What I find so surprising is dat if ah man is ah alcoholic or ah drug addict, yuh does tell de fella he cyah take ah nex’ drink for de rest of he life or even look at drugs if he want to survive. He have to find new friends, lifestyle, go to counselling, etc….
The only way to really kick ah habit is to change yuh behaviour, whether is losing weight or gettin’ off crack cocaine. So why we doh be tellin’ people to change dey lifestyle? Why we sooooo scared to say dat? If yuh doh change it, yuh go dead, dat simple! But nobody want to tell dem “older” men to stop dey nastiness wit’ dem young girls, nobody tellin’ dem young girls to get involved in other activities an’ study dey books, nobody tellin’ de “village rams” to stop runnin’ outside woman or takin’ advantage of odder people girl chilren….Why?
Dat is de real problem we have… de lack of respect and selfishness…. yuh HAVE to change yuh behaviour.
Now, doh get meh wrong, eh, I hope dey fin’ ah cure for dis t’ing, because me eh like to see people suffer, but sometimes we does cause we own sufferin’…… so until we have ah cure, be sensible nah man.. an’ show compassion to dose who have de disease.. even if yuh t’ink is “dey fault”. If you was in dere situation, you wouldna like people spittin’ on yuh, none ah we perfect… is just dat some ah we get caught!
Rather dan beat up on anybody anymore dis week, ah decide to finish up on ah high note…. las’ week an’ dis week, we had some culture alive in TnT. In St. James (de city dat doh sleep) dey had some pan on de move wit’ concerts, late night limes and some other activities…
It went dong real good, ah hear… but ah hear ‘bout it too late, so ah couldn’t give alyuh ah eye witness account, but dis week, ah take in ah back in times calypso fete in de oval in aid of a home for ole calypsonians who seein’ hard times, but who contribute to we art form.
Man, it was good! Stalin, Sparrow, Superblue, Laventille Rhythm Section, ah pan round de neck side, 3 Canal,, even David Rudder and Machel Montano put in appearance. Ah see some ole times come out to play.. ah man rest dong ah velvet suit with chain round he neck an’ t’ing… de saga boy of long ago…. some come an’ sit dong watching de performances and shakin’ to de ole time music… it had ah instrumental dey play wit’ ah horn section and some background…
Ah coulda jus’ imagine mehself, J’ouvert morning, 1960 (if ah was born, dat is…. J ) chippin’ dong de road in de cool night air… it had free coffee, free corn soup, $5 burgers, bake and shark, an’ of course ah well stocked bar! It was so nice not hearin' people tellin’ meh to "Jump! Jump! Jump!, "Put yuh han’ in de air!" Or "Wine dong low! low! low!"
Yeah man, ah leave dey after 3 in de mornin’.. ah waitin’ for part 2 , 3 and 99! Because it have some songs ah wanted to hear dat I eh hear yet, so dis cyah be de end! Yes, man… ah good time was had by all!
Alyuh ever take ah good look at how we have road signs in TnT? If I was ah tourist, I would ketch meh aunt, uncle and nennen to figure out jus’ what de #%#$@*& dem people was t’inkin’... to say nothin’ of making accident! Apparently de art of signage never came to TnT, which is why I now present SIGNAGE SYSTEM IN TnT:
If a
street is one way, make sure dat de No Entry sign is at least 20 metres up de
street… dat way de poor driver done turn into de street before he realise is ah
one way. Is more fun when he see ah
truck comin’ towards him.
When on
de highway or main road, ensure dat de sign indicating de turn offs are
less dan 100 metres from de turn off.
Dat
way yuh could make accident as yuh try to change lanes and ketch de correct
lane. After all, Police and
ambulance need work to do! Do
not for any reason put de signs above de traffic where dey can be easily read.
Make
sure dat de street signs have writing on one side only. Dat way, yuh have to
pass de street spin yuh neck round like ah corkscrew to see de sign, realise dat
yuh pass de street, and get cuss or rammed from de driver behind when yuh try to
stop an’ turn back.
Make
sure dat roads in rural areas have no signs.
If yuh doh know de area, what de hell yuh drivin’ dey for! Is also ah
good chance t get to know de people, since yuh have to ask every damn one wey de
place is, an’ yuh end up havin’ to give dem ah drop for dey services.
When yuh
swing onto ah overpass, make sure dat de overpass split suddenly into 3 or more
lanes with no signs as to which one you should take to get to your destination.
It is really fun to watch the concrete divisions on de overpass approach
your windscreen at top speed!
Don’t
warn of speed bumps or such on de roads. So
dat when drivers pass through in de night, de could mash up dey shocks and
springs. Ensure dat mechanics have
money on dey bank book. Or else dey
go have to rob people to live.
Make
sure dat “No Parking” signs have only de pole left.
Dat way motorists can wonder whether de sign had “No Entry”, “No
Parking” , “No Waiting” etc,
an’ take dey chances wit’ getting dey car wrecked.
When
fixin’ roads, or if it have ah landslip, doh put no notice sayin’
Road Works ahead ½ Mile or LANDSLIP AHEAD. Dat would only warn we to use
ah nex’ road. Is better to reach
late for work, wedding or miss yuh flight!
Don't
paint street signs regularly….. it is good to come up to "P u g
Str " or "G T rt
Av ue".
It help we to practise for when we doin’ crossword puzzle or watchin'
'Wheel of Fortune'!
Dat’s all for dis week folks… remember any queries, questions, comments, hail outs etc… jus’ write to we anchorman Cobra at ttcobra1@hotmail.com an’ we go get back to yuh… Take care care, alyuh, ah gone…. Peace….. De crowd start to roar..…. Despers gi’ we more…. We want de woman on de bass….(background music, Scrunter)
Views expressed do not reflect the opinions of KP Resorts, Ltd., it's management or staff.