TNN 80
Ah people, ah back again, we getting’ into de Carnival in ah big way now, so prepare alyuh self…. an’ wit de news form latitudes south… (deep voice)… dis is TNN…! Jump in town J’ouvert morning…fin’ yuhself in ah band… watch how de natives movin’… hug up tight wit’ ah man…. …... (background music..Kitchener)
Jumpstation: As it was in the beginning; School.. of hard knocks; Bittersweet; Carnival again.
AS IT WAS IN THE BEGINNING.....
Same story, different day…. well the West Indies finished their “summer of discontent” in Australia the same way dey began… getting’ licks like rain!
Australia scored 338 in the 50 overs and the WI surprisingly made their highest total in a One Day for the entire 3 months but it was still not enough. Like dey fellas jus’ attractin’ blows now…!
Laro went on to make de only duck on de side, as a partin’ gift to Australia… ah hear dem fellas was glad to see de back of Australia… de Aussies had dem jumpin’ like Kangaroo wit’ botheration. Even when dey battin’ dey was tauntin’ dem.. if yuh laugh yuh go jus’ spen’ de rest of yuh life cryin’ or drink somet’ing an’ end it.
Now dey have to face de most all round side in de world on home soil, come next month… South Africa in dey pfeffen.
De secon’ to las’ match was ah disaster in itself.. ah t’ink we make ah 159 or somet’ing so…. right now de West Indies have so much duck after dey name dat we could start ah poultry farm…. now man wonderin’ if Capt. (P)Adams go resign; de problem wit’ dat is, based on he scores, he cyah get ah pick on de side (if we serious) so if he slip, he slide.
An’ who could forget de WI Cricket(y) Board.. how when we ask for ah sport psychologist, de manager say de Captain should be de one to motivate de side. De Board who cyah afford to have videos of games, so players could see what dey doing wrong an’ correct it… S. Africa had ah battin’, bowlin’ an’ fielding coach for de World Cup in England.. de WI have ONE coach….. he is Superman brudder..(well he have tuh be!).
At least we see ah young Marlon Samuels (19) comin’ into he own.. some potential for Marlon Black (bowler) so it wasn’t ah total loss….. wit’ respect to de bowllin’, ah doh know when bowlers would learn NOT to bowl short AND wide.. dat is askin’ to be cannon fodder… an’ bowl a proper line an’ length instead of long hops or bouncer dat goin’ over de batsman head… look nah, ah proper bouncer suppose to go for yuh face or yuh ribs…. dat way yuh have tuh pay attention.
An’ to cap it off, Australia who have fitness for days, does rotate dey bowlers and batsmen, but we does play people until dey drop from exhaustion, an’ when dey drop, yuh drop dem from de side an’ say dat dey ent performin’…..
Ah could go on, but it doh make sense… dem is de “burn an’ never learn” crowd… at least ah go get ah chance to see South Africa from nex’ month, an’ rest assured yuh will hear de commentary from de I himself… de Cobra……
Well,
to follow all de example of “developed”
countries we abolished capital
punishment in schools an’ almost
to ah day, ah parent rush in an’ put some licks on
ah teacher wit’ ah piece of cable for
“talking hard” to he chile…..
dey
arrest him… den some chilren in ah Junior Sec. threaten some teachers
wit’ some cuttail, an’ school shut dong for 4 days, den some school girls
went after each other over “ah man”….
Now lemme make ah few t’ings clear.. I really doh have ah problem if dey abolish capital punishment in schools, but some people feel dis is ah real hindrance to chilren learnin’…… my friend, capital punishment as “abuse” is somet’ing else… yuh doh beat ah chile if dey get somet'ing wrong or dey slow or somet’ing…capital punishment is strictly for serious breaches of discipline… an’ somehow ah doh see ah teacher runnin’ up to ah six year ole, jumpin’ up in de air an’ coming dong repeatedly wit’ ah two by four on ah chile back.
So leh we eh confuse capital punishment wit’ child abuse. Next, if yuh goin’ tuh abolish it, shouldn’t you simply inform teachers, de union, call everybody togedder, work out odder methods of punishment an’ den make ah announcement? No, so everybody caught off guard an’ chilren tellin’ teachers flat “Yuh cyah beat meh, yuh know.. wha’ yuh go do?!”.
An’ de problem stem from de fact dat we forget de triangle of discipline and cooperation… parent, school, children… wit’ de firs’ two controllin’ de las’ one…… if ever dat triangle get capsize… crapaud puffin’ like ah mafia hitman on yuh pipe!
But parents doh go to school to see what goin’ on, de school have no system for discipline which de parents agree to… so de chilren runnin’ wild…. First of all, de parents responsible for any chile under 17, so if ah chile commit ah crime or serious breach in discipline, dat parent(s) have to come to school or court wit’ de chile.. an’ if ah repeat occurs, well is juvenile home, social work and monitioring by ah officer of de state, who checkin’ every week to see dat t’ings in order.
We have to take ah stand somewhere…. we breedin’ criminal in we system! Wey de social workers, wey de counsellors? Every school suppose to have dem….. chilren not taught to be responsible for anything.. in Japan, at de end of de day, school chilren pick up paper in dey classrooms…. here chilren does throw paper on de floor an’ say “we givin’ de cleaners work to do!” I see METAL chairs piled more dan 12 feet high in ah pile because dey mash up…. aluminum louvres torn out, door knobs ripped off doors, graffiti in permanent marker all over de school….. what happen.. is “leggo-beasts” in dem classrooms?
Is metal furniture, ah say….. everybody suppose to be responsible for de school… yuh see ah chair breakin’, report it…. yuh walk in an’ find yuh desk fallin’ dong, report it… or else you go be held responsible… yuh wonder why young people eh votin’ or involved in community help groups? Is because dey eh feel no responsibility to dey country…
Every school suppose to have ah student council which should make representation to de PTA and staff, an’ in ah wider sense, every school district suppose to have ah student council to make representation to de ministry concerning problems of chilren in schools… dat is how dey learn about government and representation… den dey go also have to explain an’ account for all de mash up furniture in school an’ institute monitors to ensure dat de school furniture is taken care off….
Look, alyuh better gi’ meh de Education Minister job,
yes.. because ah have too much ideas to keep to mehself!
But
seein’ de situation, ah realise we go have to change some words in we
dictionary……
Flogging- what a teacher gets for raising his/her voice at a child
School bag- a receptacle for weapons and limin’ clothes
Ah man- what every young girl over 13 must have
Classroom- see battlefield (n)
Education - An option in schools
School- precursor to prison
Children- those who run the school
Teacher- a nervous, endangered species
Parents- someone who teacher knows exists, but never sees…
Eh heh… well Caroni is at it again… las’ week dey run out of money to pay farmers for dey cane, farmers shut dong de factories for 3 days by parkin’ dey trucks in front of de compound.. dey demand payment, we nearly had ah sugar shortage, government find $19 M to give dem… de nurses eh get one black cent after 2 months of protest.. interestin’… an’ dis is for ah crop which can NEVER make money again in life.. it costs more to produce cane dan de money we getting’ for it…years now…it cheaper to buy sugar abroad, but we holdin' on to Caroni sugar as though is oil…if yuh plant cassava yuh go make more money!
Dis company had nearly one Billion dollars in debt written off and in less dan 2 years run up ah nex’ 500 Million in debt. Dey say de had ah plan for makin’ de company profitable in 2 years (dat was 1998).
I have ah plan too…..shut de damn t’ing dong! Produce cane for LOME and for some domestic consumption and plant, citrus, peas and beans, ground provisions, set up poultry and dairy farms and get into some serious agricultural production and value added products.
But we stick up in de wretched cane like ah boil weevil! Like dey sipping too much of de products of de sugar cane! But some people know dat de votes comin’ from dat area, so dey walkin’ carefully, an’ odder governments who know dey still wasn’t getting’ votes from Caroni, tryin’ to win dem over, so dey let de t’ing run downhill, dragging taxpayers money behind.
Every year we should have ah bonfire… just take $300M an’ burn it, because dat is what we doin’ wit’ Caroni sugar…..!
Ass(I)am say he goin’ to make some decisions about Caroni in de country’s interest.. much talk… we wait an’ see… dis is one sugar dat eh sweet atall!…
Yeah, yeah, yeah.. people harasssing meh about what goin’ on in Carnival dis year….. well De Cobra beat 2 all inclusive an’ because of meh shallow pockets, ah t’ink dat is it for de fete…is only Calypso tent now and watchin’ shows on TV.
Ah did promise mehself not to pay no money to go to no All Inclusive (which is really exclusive), but ah went to de cheapest ones an’ some of de proceeds goin’ to charity, so I eh too disturbed.
De other option is to fete wit’ de bare back, tear dong fence (yes, dey do it already for de year… in WASA fete), ragamuffin, scan–dem-before-dey-go-in crew. So unfortunately we have dis unecessary divide. Some of dey odder fetes like ANYHOWERS and OVER DE HILL BOYS etc., still have reasonable fetes at good prices… but dem is ah dyin’ breed as far as dat kinda fete is concern.
Now I
doh eat when I go fete, so is no way ah could see meh way wit’ payin’ ah
setta money to go to 5 All Inclusive… Now before ah go, ah does go by every
stall an’ take ah plate ah food, so ah have food for days…….!
Anyway, Shadow havin’ he biggest year since Bassman.. de man mashing up fete wit’ Strangers and Yuh lookin’ for Horn…. Devasting! Music, Lyrics, badness…! Yeah boy! He blow way dem young boys… de las’ fete ah went to, as soon as yuh hear de Shadow an’ he trademark… Aaah waah yaaa ya yey ya wah….. hol’ meh back!
Ah Bajan fella call Rupee woulda sure take Road March dis year, if ah non Trinibagonian coulda win it….. if yuh hear dat sound an’ de chorus… an’ if yuh marrid.. take yuh wife wit’ yuh to dem fete… dem women go make yuh blood crawlllll..…..Pressah!
When Lisa Romany in Traffik drop ah “tremble” on yuh so, yuh does really shake! Tremble it an’ raise it up! Tremble it an’ raise up! (Make yuh rag tremble in front of yuh, den fling it up).
Man, yuh boy Cobra invent de “double wave”.. ah have ah patent, so doh try nothin’! Ah walkin’ wit’ TWO rag, so if yuh going to wave.. listen carefully… yuh cross yuh hand in front yuh body an’ den up an’ out, dong, cross, up an’ out! Make sure yuh have room or yuh could damage somebody (who might den damage you!).
An’ doh forget de odder waves eh, de helicopter (over yuh head an’ whirl), de windmill (ah side whirl), de fling (t’row yuh hand up an’ dong) an’ if de tempo slower… de “sway” (side to side).
So now alyuh remember, alyuh ready for de Mas..alright follow meh…..