TNN 107

Hello folks..welcome to our broadcast from latitudes South…we back again…an’ (deep voice)… dis is TNN….. Ah goin’ an’ party toniiiiiiight…….ah goin’ an’ party tonight! ..(background music….Shortshirt?)

Jumpstation: Sea-saw; Talk eh cheap; Take a drink from de (World) Cup; Scholl days.

Yeah, de SEA (Secondary Entrance Assessment) results came out last week, to de usual cheers and tears.. some chilren get to go to de schools dey want, some didn’t……..but dey say all children have been placed. 

Ah doh know when dis t’ing wil end.  Bas (during his stint as PM) say chilren used to be traumatised when dey “fail” so no matter if yuh get 1%, yuh still goin’ to secondary school…ability to read or count nonwitstanding. 

Of course when dey get to Secondary school, dey cyah read dey textbooks, so dat is anodder story!  Ah wonder why dey does start to misbehave? Yuh would like sittin’ down for hours wit’ ah book yuh cyah read from?   So de poor teachers dem start “remedial” classes, and of course cyah finish de syllabus an’ den de chilren write CXC after 5 years………do dey pass?…welll…we have 80% in some schools not even gettin’ 5 passes (which is de basic full certificate)…..den off to the (un)employment world.  An’ we fin’ dat is de bes’ education system we could devise.

Now, if we look carefully, we need to do two things… ensure that every school in an area is of a certain standard.  Dat way, dey could zone chilren without any problem.  If ah chile gets below a particular grade, DO NOT send them to secondary school!  Send them to a remedial learning centre in the area and then on to secondary school (if yuh feel dey go feel bad to stay back in school). 

WHY we feel dat if ah child eh reach ah certain level by a certain stage, we should just shunt them off?  Some chilren are slow developers… dis nonsense about sending ah chile off to secondary school because dey go feel bad if dey stay back is ridiculous, absurd and a waste of taxpayers money…dey go dey, dey frustrated and dey fail later on…simple! But ah suppose by dat time, dey eh care ‘bout education no more, so dey doh feel bad if dey fail! Cheap politics, dat's what it is….

We still eh have technical/vocational subjects as equal to others like geography, physics, etc…. if yuh dunce, go to tech/voc…..another absudity!  Why “bright” chilren in “prestige” schools are not exposed to those subjects? ..Which is a large part of the reason for their stigmatisation …”bright” chilren doh do technical/vocational subjects!

We have yet to instill proper sports programs and above all, DISCIPLINE in government schools.. students run t’ings…any attempt to punish or correct deviant behaviour will warp little minds who by age 18, will pull a trigger without a twitch of conscience…!

And why are students, all students forced to write secondary examination after 5 years.. knowing full well that some of the schools are chock full of children who scored below 50 % in the SEA?  Why not give dem 6 years? Ah mean, it seem like commonsense to me….! Those who in the five years have caught on and are ready, by all means let them go ahead, but my word, doh force all ah dem to write the exam……de result will be preordained.

Dey say dey have some reforms comin’…again! And de Teachers Union (TTUTA) say dey care about education.. man, ah feel TTUTA need some tutorting deyself!  Ah hope de government EXAMining all ah sayin’….!

TALK EH CHEAP...

As we former PM Bas is discoverin’!   First he get ah $60,000 fine in he waist when he call Ken Gordon ah “pseudo-racist” an’ accuse de man of using race to get he own way…. 

He get soak wit’ dat fine! So he appeal it, but it eh come up for hearin’ yet…..(good luck!).  Now he say dat de President used “racial considerations” in appointing Manning as PM.  Yataks!  Ah next suit in he tail!  Dat man mus’ be have de slowest learnin’ curve in dis part of de hemisphere! 

Yuh go get ketch twice for de SAME offence, sayin’ de SAME t’ing?! What does dat say….? Now he on ah crusade.. dey pass up de Deputy DPP for de secon’ time an’ appoint somebody else DPP…is race!  Mind you, he pass up de same man, sayin’ dat de Justice and Legal Service Commission gi’ him only one name, so he appoint de man…….now de JLSC is racist! 

Now de appointment for Chief Justice comin’ up, he say if dey pass up ah certain person (who was passed up before, I must add)..an’ appoint ah nex’ fella, well de President racist. 

Now de Prez suppose to consult, not take, de advice of de Opposition Leader and de Prime Minister before puttin’ de person in place…  Bas refuse to accept de post of Opposition leader, so of course de Prez. have no one but de PM to consult…. so yuh have ah chance to be part of de process, yuh opt out an’ now t’rowin’ stones…ah doh know why one doh hit him in he head! 

Now he threatening to block de streets of Port of Spain if dey eh set ah date for elections (de result will simply be ah good cut--- for he followers who annoy other drivers!). 

Everybody know dat de Budget cyah pass so election date mus’ be given by August/September….. no genius required, but he hurry for election when everybody getting’ ready to leave de country for vacation…Steups!

Now I agree dat Manos need to get serious an’ give ah time, but Bas had all de time in de worl’ to help elect ah Speaker an’ stay on dey back in Parliament (an’ get paid!) an’ force ah election, but havin’ to take up de Post of Opposition Leader stick in he craw! He cyah swallow dat atall, atall atall! 

He say he resigning if he lose de nex’ election..he will NEVER be Opposition leader again!  Power is ah hell of ah t’ing , eh boy…? 

Anyway, whatever he decide to do, ah would advise him to keep he mouth shut for de time being or it go drive him to poverty!

TAKE A DRINK FROM DE (WORLD) CUP.....

Ha! Haaaa! Did I not tell dem so?!  De doubters…those who watch rather than “think” football…. The samba boys danced their way into de finals and captured the prize wit’ style. 

Poor Germany…..looked out of sorts, out of form, out of luck.…look, dem was just OUT!  Ah tell dem look at de statistics.. only one team WIN all de matches.. dey eh draw none, dey win….!  Five people on de team scoring.. how yuh go mark 5 people….…

Oh, de german defence good…yuh ever see ah defender score goals (which incidentally win matches!).  Man, ah get up early an’ ah plop mehself dong on de couch…meh heart racing, meh chest hurtin’ meh…everytime de brazilians touch de ball ah jump up….!

When dey score de firs’ time, ah jump an’ bawl….gooooaaaaaallllll!  Well, when dey score de second one wit’ dat dummy play, ah collapse on de floor, den ah jump up an’ down, give dem de samba dance an’ den run all t’rough de house…..we bury dem like pirates’ treasure!  Our goal was to score goals! When de team captain go to get de trophy, he insist he had to stand up on de platform de trophy was on, they had to hold it dong while he climb on an’ den he raise it like ah gladiator wit’ de prize…vanquished! …all opponents lie in de dust at my feet! Brrrazillllll! 

Okay, now dat dat off meh chest, what about dat 3rd and 4th place playoff on Saturday…man de “Young Turks” take out de South Koreans, but dem fellas play wit’ heart!  An’ it was great to see at de end of de match how both team embrace each other, form ah line with one Turk, one South Korean, etc.. strectching right across de field an’ de crowd roared its approval! Ah South Korean crowd! 

An’ de crowning moment was to see South Koreans fans unrollin' ah huge Turkish flag in de stadium! Man, ah get goose pimples!  Everybody was happy..an’ sad.. neither team expected to reach so far in de tournament, so there were no losers, in dat sense……..

But fren, de las’ match was ah war! Winner take all..who vex, lorse!  Only one would be left standing…such is de great game of football….waaaaayyyyboy!  At last ah could get some sleep, but yuh mean ah have to wait 4 years to see dat again….?! Dat is penance!

SCHOOL DAYS.....

Ah boy, yuh remember when yuh was in school an’ yuh seein’ two months ah holidays stretch out in front of yuh like ah road map? Yuh dizzy wit’ joy! Yuh might’n see too much of yuh school friends, but oh gooooorrrrrmmmmm!  No more homework, sleepin’ in de car on de way to school, exam to write, etc…
Well papa, yuh mus’ know is long August vacation (NOT summertime!) when…….

Yuh seein’ some shows for de firs’ time on TV (yuh was never home to see dem before!)…..

Yuh have to slow down at every cinema corner because it have ah setta young people crossin’ de road……

Piarco Airport have line longer dan ah government lie…! 

Yuh food bill skyrocket…dem termite children eatin’ everything in sight!

Dem stupid radio announcers start advertising SUMMERfest…..! 

Yuh mango an’ plum lookin’ nice on yuh tree in de mornin’, but by de time yuh reach back home, de tree clean! 

Every day de chilren fightin’ because dey eh used to bein’ togedder for so long….!

Every road in de neighbourhood have ah cricket or football match on it……(wey all dese chilren come from?!)

If yuh lucky, yuh goin’ “away” by family…….

Yuh remember what it was like to be ah chile…… J 

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Dat’ s all for dis weeks folks..remember any queries, comments, questions, hail outs, etc…just write to we anchorman Cobra at ttcobra1@hotmail.com an’ we go get back to alyuh… Peace, ah gone…blessings…. School days was very happy days…… (background music, Sparrow)